Saturday, March 8, 2014

Lovegurus Would Be Star Campaigners In Upcoming Election

In coming election, lovegurus would be star campaigners of political parties. They would also contest elction on major political parties' tickets. It is being said that there is huge demands of lovegurus in the forthcoming parliamentary election. All major political parties have made their minds to give maximum party's tickets to Lovegurus. The reason of it, is that glamour of caste is not working like before and Bollywood stars are also not so effective. Actually people have started realising that in the name of caste political parties are making them fool for their narrow political gain. So political parties are changing their strategy in new political scenario to win the maximum number of seats. Realising that young voters would be a major role in forming the next government at centre, political parties have decided to change their political fortune through popularity of Lovegurus. To attract the crowd, Political parties have also decided to use Lovegurus in their political campaign. Political parties have also decided to make Lovegurus star campaigners. Actually, political parties are of the view that by making them their star campaigners, they would be successful in wooing young voters so that Lovegurus are popular among young voters. Political parties have also made plans to provide love tips to youths through election rallies. This means that where one had Lovegurus would appeal voters to vote for a particular party, on the other hand, they would also give love tips to younger voters. After indication that Lovegurus are getting prominence in election campaign as well as ticket distribution, their value was seen skyrocketing. Loveguru share in Bombay stock exchange toched a new high. Investors shown their keen interest in buying Loveguru shares seeing huge profits in it in coming days. Surprisingly foreign investors were also not behind in buying Loveguru shares. They also bought Loveguru shares in good number.( By badbolan guru in bura n mano holi hai)

Thursday, March 6, 2014

AAP Released Election Manifesto

Aam Aadmi Party (AAP) chief Arvind Kejriwal released manifesto of his party in New Delhi on Thursday. Speaking on the occasion he said that if he becomes PM after the election, he will run the central government from Ramlila maidan. He also said that key decisions of his government would be taken by the agitators. Releasing AAP's election manifesto he said that after becoming prime minister of the country, his main work will be to stage dharnas in all district headquarters of the country. The AAP chief also said that during sit in (dharna) he would motivate people to oppose decisions of his own government. Talking about AAP's election manifesto he said that after coming to power his government's priority would be to construct grand dharna sites in all parts of the country. The AAP chief also said that there will be no scarcity of funds in construction of dharna site. Former Delhi Chief Minister said that huge funds will be spent on construction of dharna sites and Architects from all over the world will be hired for construction of dharna sites in India. He also informed that a grand dharna site will be constructed in the national capital Delhi, which will be more beautiful than Taj Mahal. Aam Aadmi party leader said that his dream project will be main attraction for foreign tourists. He also termed sit in as a main tool of poverty elimination and said that to overcome from slowdown he would stage dharna in everywhere in the country. Arvind Kejriwal also said that during his tenure as a PM the country would earn more revenue through dharna. Arvind Kejriwal also said that his government will provide life time pension to those who will actively take part in dharna ( sit in) and demonstrations. The AAP leader also said that strict action would be taken against those officials who would try to stop dharna ( sit in) and demonstrations in the country. He also said that if be required then he would not hesitate in staging dharna against such officials. Talking about the party's mainefesto he said that if he came to power then Defense budget would be zeroed because he strongly feels that there is no need of security in the country. AAP chief said that in his regime Army would be withdrawal from the border as well as terrorist hit Kashmir because he thinks that sit in ( dharna) would be more effective in bringing peace and stability in the country. He also claimed that after formation of his government China and Pakistan would stop their anti-India activities because they would realise that he can stage dharna against them. ( Badbolan guru- in Bura na mano holi hai.)

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Thousands Died In Loo At Everest

More than thousands people died in loo at the world's highest peak Everest. On Wednesday temperature at the world's highest peak was recorded 150 Celsius. Seeing the temperature rise at the world's highest peak heavy paramilitary forces have been deployed there and round the clock vigil is being maintained. The police have surrounded the hospitals where heat stroke patients are being treated. It is also being said that heat stroke patients are being thoroughly checked through metal detectors before allowing them for treatment in hospitals. Schools and colleges have been closed there. Astrologers have predicted more temperature rise in coming days. The cause of temperature rise is said to be intensive plantations drive at Everest. It is mentioned worthy here that the Everest government had launched a special plantations drive and more than two-crore plants had been planted in just one month. According to experts plantations drive has left negative impact on the environment of the Everest. It is being said that more than one crore people have been affected from heat stroke. They are being treated in Intensive Care Unit by jhola chhap doctors . Jhola Chhap Doctors have advised the government of Everest to immediately shift the rest population to thaar desert so that people could get respite from high temperature. Jhola Chhap Doctors have also said that the temperature of the thaar dessert is moderate and will be just for heat stroke patients. On the advise of Jhola Chhap doctors, the Everest government has hired some bullock carts to shift the population to thaar desert. Till filing of this report people were going to Thaar desert in buttock carts.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Narendra Modi Agreed For Marriage

Political leaders are making all eforts to woo the voters to ensure their victory in upcoming parliamentary election. Even they are getting married to make their image in public. Acorting to Humor Satire new BJP PM candidate Narendra Modi may announce that he will marry just after the completion of the forthcoming parliamentary election. According to an outsider of the party, Gujarat chief Minister will convene a press conference in one or two days to make formal announcement about his decision to marriage. It is being said that BJP priministerial candidate Narendra Modi was initially against his marriage but before the decision of the party he was to change his decision. It is all being said that the party has issued a whip to him to marry as quick as possible to make himself more acceptable among voters. After the decision of the party about his marriage he sought time from the party's president Rajnath Singh on this ground that due to tight shedule of the election he would not get time for marriage. He assured the party chief that he will get married just after the concluding parliamentary election. It is also being said that Gujarat strong man also gave a written assurance to the party in this regard. Actually, the BJP think tanks are of the view that after getting married Mr. Modi would be more popular among married people while Congress vice-president would be left behind in popularity graph from BJP's PM candidate. The step is being considered balancing act of the party as the party believes that Modi's marriage may reduce Arvind Kejriwal's effect and may ensure the party victory in forthcoming parliamentary election. Mr. Modi's Political opponents are trying to know about his love affair by daydreaming. They are holding daydreaming competitions among their supporters to know about his love affair and his wife's name. Narrating his daydreaming a political opponent said that Modi has love affair with moon based a girl. He also said that Modi has been in love with her nearly 100 years. Talking about Mr. Modi's wife he said that his wife has been former miss universe. He also said that Mr. Modi regularly goes to moon meet his wife. Another his political opponent said that Mr. Modi' wife is the tallest leader of the moon and he takes his political decision according to her advise. He also said that Mr. Modi's love affair is 80 years old. According to an unconfirmed report after Mr.Modi's consent to get married after the election Congress and AAP held Marathon meetings to decide their future course of action in new political scenario. In Congress party's meeting several party leaders said that Congress vice-president Rahul Gandhi should also announce the date of his marriage so that BJP could not take political mileage of Mr. Modi's marriage - Report is based on daydreaming.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Political Parties Want To Use Venom GT In Election Campaign

The impact of the test drive of Venom GT car in US, is largely being seen in India.The leaders of various political party have decided to use Venom GT car in their election campaign. They are of the view that Venom GT car would prove better than helicopter in election campaigning. Actually political parties are trying to woo voters at all cost, so they they are using all means to win the election. An online survey conducted by Humor Satire News to know the choices of political leaders in their election campaign, shows that political leaders preferred Venom GT car to helicopter. The congress party held a press conference in New Delhi and said that the party leaders would largely use Venom GT cars in their election campaigns. The party also inform that it would seek permission from Election Commission in this regard. The congress party said that the party took decision to use Venom GT car, because the party leaders could reach on time to address their election rallies. The BJP will also use Venom GT car in its election campaign. The BJP also claimed that high speed of the car will helpful in winning the election for the party. The ruling Congress and the opposition Bhartiya Janta Party both have promised in their election mainefestos that if they come to power in the forthcoming parliamentary election, then they will ensure free distribution of GT car to the countrymen. Both parties have also claimed that free distribution of Venom GT car would ensure overall development of the countrymen. In a statement, the Congress described the main specialties of Venom GT car and said that if the party comes to power then it will fulfill the aspirations of the people to ride on Venom GT car. The principle oopposition party BJP has also made similar promises to voters. The party in a statement said that just after becoming PM of Narendra Modi, the party would start car distribution to the countrymen. According to political observers, political parties have failed in addressing the main issues of the people so they want to use Venom GT car to divert the attention of the people. The Congress party wants to avoid its anti- party wave in upcoming election by using it in its election campaign while BJP wants to use it to make Gujarat chief minister Narendra Modi next prime minister.